Looking back at 2010

As we ring in the New Year, I am taking a moment to look back at the highlights of last year.

Here is the summation of 2010 in no particular order. Our family wrote a Family Creed. Scott’s Grandma Ada passed away. We adopted a 7 year old Golden Retriever named Louie. We did our family vacation locally—and loved it. On a personal front: Scott is closing in on 10 years with Verizon Wireless. He became the Cub Scout Leader for Zefram’s Den and is running Alex’s Destination Imagination team as well as DI for Crofton Woods Elementary School. Jena has been appointed to the Maryland State Council on Child Abuse and Neglect, is now a Vigil Volunteer for Hospice of the Chesapeake, and a Lay Minister for the Unitarian Universalist Church in Annapolis.

She also had surgery to fix her torn rotator cuff. Alex entered 4th grade and is an avid reader and a WONDERFUL cellist who is coming into his own at school. He biked 22 miles in the Soft Shell Century. Zefram (our favorite middle child) went on ADHD medication which has been life changing for the entire family. He loves to build and create modern art from refuse. Last but not least, we are trying to rein Athena’s 3 year old Goddess temper in. She recently got potty trained and started pre-school at Community United Methodist Church. However, the biggest event this year was Scott and Jena renewing their 10 year wedding vows with family and friends.

May 2011 be as joyous and meaningful.

Our Deepest Fear is that We are Powerful...

The December season is a special season that inspires hope and reminds us of who we are inside. I love the lights in the Holiday season. The Christmas season reminds me of the light inside of each human being. This light is a magnificent radiant light. May your light burn bright today. Hear is a quote to remind you of who you really are.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

Love is Blind

When we say that “Love is Blind” we often think of two people in love like Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, but the phrase has implications on every relationship that we have. Over time I have learned that any love worth having is truly blind. Recently our family adopted a 7 year old dog named Louie. Unfortunately, Louie had a habit of using my carpet as his own personal latrine. Louie has another bad habit of rolling in smelly stuff. Although we were able to curb his inside behavior, he still comes in smelling pretty awful at least once a week. We thought that these behaviors were deal breakers when we first got Louie. They made me see red—as I am the one who usually cleans up the mess. Then one day my perspective changed. I saw Louie playing on the floor with my 3 year old daughter. Athena was rolling over Louie like a steam roller. Louie just sat there and happily obliged her every whim. He even allowed her to walk him around the house on a leash, dress him up, and tie him to whatever fancied her heart. Louie is very good tempered and is like this with all my children all the time. He loves being a family dog and rises to the occasion of whatever my kids throw at him without getting the slightest bit growly. As I looked at him and Athena playing together on the carpet, I realized that “love is blind.” I had to admit it to myself. I definitely love Louie—stinky dog smell and all. The simple fact is that I can focus on the 10% that Louie does wrong and be miserable or I can focus on the 90%that makes our family happy.

In truth, everyone is like Louie. We all have traits and habits and indiscretions that others find loathsome. We all metaphorically roll in things that don’t smell so good from time to time. There are no perfect people. For example I love my son but he is a drama king, my other son is hyperactive and my daughter would be perfect if she wasn’t such a bossy little creature. Don’t even let me get started about my husband or my grandmother. However, in order to really love them or anyone for that matter we must be willing to look past their faults and see their perfection. Like Louie, it is not the fact that they roll in smelly stuff that matters, it is that for the other 90% of the day my kids are amazing and so is my Husband and Grandmother as well as anyone I know.

This action of seeing people’s perfection instead of their limitations is driven home this time of year as we get together with friends and family for Thanksgiving. As we sit at the Thanksgiving table look at all the people across from us. We are reminded that each one of them carries baggage that we don’t like and don’t talk about in civil company. I will go as far as to say we would not even associate with some of them if they were not related to us. Every one of the people around you at the table has foibles. They’re Republicans or Democrats. They’re homosexual or homophobic. They’re drunks or teetotalers, fundamentalists, agnostics or atheists. They are a whole host of other ‘-ists’ that we find intolerable. You name your poison; the list goes on and on. They are all represented at the Thanksgiving table and we break bread with them anyway despite the elephant in the room and the enforced silence about certain topics. Without this blind spot that you make for the people you love we would not be able to love them at all. So yes—love is blind. It should be no other way. After all, much like the inclusions in a diamond, it is our imperfections that make us special.

Back to basics

My torn rotator cuff put me out of the game since January. I have been unable to exercise. Over time my habits changed, my life became more sedentary and my body became soft. This had devastating effects on my self-esteem and I became depressed. I had lost my balance and my edge. Contrary to what you might think, this downward spiral was not all ego based. As I once learned in Karate our lives must be balanced, “Body, Mind and Spirit” for us to be the wonderful creatures that we were meant to be. Balance in these 3 areas puts us in accord with the universe and all goodness flows from that. The Bible even holds that our body is the temple of God. If this is indeed the case, then everything that we do in life starts with our core being. Therefore it was back to basics for me. This week has been devoted to my center. In order to do this, I started practicing yoga again and the effects on my psyche in just one week have been astounding. I am standing straighter, my posture is better, my self confidence is back and I am happy and centered. I know that this is just the beginning but “the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.” I have committed to myself to do Yoga every day for 30 days. I am on day seven. Every part of my body aches with pain but I am relishing the feeling of soreness knowing that I am transforming inside and out. As they say, “all is well with my soul.”

The 2010 Cochrane Family Creed

Our family created a Family Creed this year. We are trying to use it as our family's mission statement to help us stay on course as a family. Everything we do (together or seperately) should come back to this statement.


Love yourself;
Love one another;
Love and respect the entire planet and the universe;
Make that love visible through deeds.

Our family is alive to;
Marvel at nature,
give thanks,
forgive others,
make everyone feel of worth
and to serve others
while bringing creativity,
joy and learning to everything we do;
All from within a state of quite cool.

The President of the United States in Bowie,MD

I make no bones about the fact that I love President Barack Obama. In fact it was going to his Inauguration that spurred me to write my blog in the first place. But today was a sweet day; I got to see President Obama with my own two eyes from about 40 feet away at Bowie State University. No matter what your politics, it is aw inspiring to see the President of the United States of America. I absolutely love him! He always inspires me to want to be a better person. I am so grateful that my husband sent me the invite to see the Prsident. My husband went above the call of duty. He even got up early to take me to the train station so that I could have this moment after working all night. He is such an amazing man.

Forever Dog

It is common knowledge that our family has raised 3 dogs for Guiding Eyes for the Blind, GEB. We did not know how impacting this was on Alex’s life until he read an Open Court assignment last year in school on a boy who had gone through the experience of raising and giving up his dog Rosie for the blind. Alex steadfastly refused to do the assignment and then dissolved into a heap of tears when I finally read the story to him as a last resort. His teacher, Scott, and I all talked to Alex and he learned what a great organization Guiding Eyes was. They were not just puppy thieves. We told him how Guiding Eyes taught our family about giving; Nevertheless, Scott and I agreed that it was time for a forever dog outside of GEB. Thus we have Louie. Louie is a beautiful 7 year old Golden retriever that Scott calls furniture because he is as big as a Shetland pony. Louie was being liquidated in a divorce and needed a home. He had previously grown up with a wonderful family that has 3 children about the same ages as our children. Louie was love at first sight. Louie literally ended up on our door step and after one night it felt like Louie had lived hear all his life. Louie has such a laid back temper. He lets the children use him daily as a jungle gym for their exercise and sleeps on the boy’s floor. Our family can not say enough nice things about Louie. He is smart, food driven and has nice manors. Clearly you can tell that he was loved all his life. But my favorite part is that he learned (in 2 days) not to come into the kitchen and what the house rules were. Louie is such a love. He is everything we always wanted in a forever dog.